Saturday, May 21, 2011

Future Coolest Car: Eco-Friendly Porsche 918 Spyder

Most people wouldn’t expect a car that can go from 0-60 in under 3.2 seconds to be eco-friendly in the least, but the Porsche automakers beg to differ. This future car concept, the 918 Spyder, is supposed to be one of the fastest (if not the fastest) hybrid electric car on the market. This one-of-a-kind ride can teach tops speeds of 200 mph and gets a whopping 78 miles per gallon – double the amount most compact cars achieve on a good day.

This speed demon is charged by a 3.4 liter V8 engine which comes equipped with a lithium ion battery pack that can be charged from almost anywhere, not to mention whenever you hit the brakes as well. No word yet on the pricing but you can safely assume it will be in the 6 digit field (estimates have been set near the $500,000 mark), and is not expected to be listed for sale on the market for at least another year, probably closer to 2012 or 2013. The bad news is that you probably never will own one of these babies, or anything close to it, but the good news is that future cars will benefit from these technological break-throughs and the overall quality of regular day-to-day cars will be enhanced. Way to go Porsche!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Selling Tricks

The kids filed back into class Monday morning.

They were very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship.

Little Mary led off, "I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "my sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."

"Very good," said the teacher.

Little Sally was next, "I sold magazines," she said, "I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them abreast of current events."

"Very good, Sally," said the teacher.

Eventually, it was Little Johnny's turn. The teacher held her breath. Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk. "$2,467," he said.

"$2,467!" cried the teacher, "What in the world were you selling?"

"Toothbrushes," said Little Johnny.

"Toothbrushes?" echoed the teacher, "How could you possibly sell enough toothbrushes to make that much money?"

"I found the busiest corner in town," said Little Johnny, "I set up a Dip & Chip stand. I gave everybody who walked by a sample.

They all said the same thing. "Hey, this tastes like dirt!" Then I would say, "It is, wanna buy a toothbrush?"

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Black And Brown

Little Johnny had been bringing his drawings home from kindergarten every day since he started a month ago. Each day his mother admired the pictures and hung them on the refrigerator. One thing started bothering her. Little Johnny only used black and browns for his drawings. Fearing a problem and not wanting it to get worse, she decided to take him to a child psychologist.

The psychologist delicately went to work. He gave Little Johnny a battery of psychological tests. He chatted with Little Johnny. Everything seemed perfectly normal. Every day for two weeks, the tests continued. Yet everyday, Little Johnny continued to bring home drawings in only blacks and browns.

Frustrated at not being able to get to the root of the problem and fearful that something was terribly wrong, the child psychologist decided to give Little Johnny some paper and a box of crayons and observe what happened.

Little Johnny opened the box of crayons and said, "Oh, Boy! A new box of crayons! At school we only have old boxes. The only ones left in mine are black and brown!"

Friday, November 21, 2008

Good Manners

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question: "Michael, if you were on a date, having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?"

Michael said, "Just a minute, I have to go pee."

The teacher responded by saying, "That would be rude and impolite."

"What about you Peter, how would you say it?" Peter said, "I'm sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back."

"That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table."

And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?"

I would say, "Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after dinner."

The teacher fainted.

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